Helping Bullied, Bullies AND Bystanders

Posted on: 06/28/18 3:23 AM | by Jonathan McKee

Today I’m working on a brand new workshop for parents, teachers and youth workers helping kids experiencing bullying.

Notice I didn’t say “helping kids who are bullied.” This is where my training will immediately differ from others. I’m not just advocating help for kids who have been picked on, but help for the bullied, bullies and bystanders. After hundreds of interviews and 100+ hours of research for my upcoming book The Bullying Breakthrough… I found that most kids fall into one of three categories:

The Bullied

The Bully

The Bystander

Kids who are bullied definitely need help, mostly empathy. Not necessarily someone to come and “fix” the situation (because most of the bullied don’t think anything can be done to fix it, they fear adults will only make the situation worse), but someone to listen and understand.

Bullies need more help than they realize. Most bullies are acting out on their own insecurities, trying to raise themselves on the social ladder by knocking others down. They don’t necessarily recognize their negative behaviors and they’ve never risked trying to fit in without them.

But bystanders are truly intriguing. Bystanders are a diverse crowd. Most are basically standing at the crossroads. They witness teasing or intimidating and they have a choice how to respond. Many of them earn their title at this point, bystanders, because they simply “stand by” and do nothing. But some of them will do the opposite. They’ll “stand up” for what’s right.

This creates a huge opportunity for ministry, especially with today’s generation of young people. I love speaking to this group about helping others. This generation cares and wants to make an impact; they sometimes just lack the guidance of how they can truly make a difference. Imagine the possibilities when an entire generation of bystanders is encouraged and equipped to reach out to someone hurting?

“Standing up” and doing something is not a foreign concept right now. Even their entertainment is advocating it. (13 Reasons Why, Drake’s God’s Plan…)

Are you helping the bullied?

What about bullies?

Are you equipping bystanders to not just “stand by”?

This is the bullying breakthrough. The book hits shelves this November. I’m launching the training along with my other workshops this fall. CLICK HERE if you want to know more about bringing this training to your city.

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